i feel stupid...

i feel stupid right now..
i don't know why..
maybe because i'm not ready to face everyone..
i am in a major depression..
maybe i'm in a some kind of a psychiatric disorder..
i need someone talk with..
but my thoughts are not compiled and organized...
everything is scattered right now..
i feel like dying..
i don't feel loved by anyone..
eventhough i know that someone loves me..
i am a jerk!
i am stupid!
i don't like what i feel right now..
God help me through this feeling...
i reall don't like it!

unTitLed iS what i naMe iT...

I've rEad eVery boOk,
i'vE suNg eVery song..
mY miNd mAy bE riGht,
But mY heArt feELs sO wroNg...
teLL mE hoW mucH furTher cAn my liFe gO aLong?

i do nOt knoW hoW to liVe wiThout yOu..
i wAnt yoU heRe by My siDe foRever..
anD iF God is wiLLing,
i'm rEady tO loVe yoU foRever..
eVen deatH cAn maKe uS pArt..
iT is yOu wHo i waNt!
iT iS You wHo i nEEd!
iT is yOU whO i LOVE!

my sleepless nights...

countless of sleepless nights
is what i've spent
for all those time that
i cry , weep, and beg for your love...

but as days pass..
i realize that this is dead end..
i have no way to go...
my only option is to turn back..
leave this all behind
and find a new way,
where i know that i won't suffer and get hurt..

a pleasant goodbye
and a wonderous thank you to you..
at least i've learned a lot
and suffered with worth....

the last judgement..

poetic disarray...

i don not know how to handle this feeling.l..
here i am tonight,
sitting,
cryi8ng at the corner of my room..
all i'm facing now is the floor..
i can only see the dusts,
the blackness,
nothing more..
i feel sad and empty about what's happening..
i wish that someday someone will be proud of me..
tell the world how gorgeous, loving, and intelligent i am..
but then,
i know that it will happen after a long period of time...
after i'm gone..
lying cold in my coffin..
six feet below the ground...

politics..

the world of politics is really dirty..
i do not understand these politicians..
why do they have to kill each one of them?
is it because of power? fame? fortune?
well, for whatever reason they have,
i know that they are wrong..

in the first place,
they are at their position because of the people..
they are at the government to serve the people who voted for them..
they supposed to be the one whose working for us..
not us working for them..

i do understand that unity is a big factor for a country to be progressive..
but of course, the government and the people placed there are a big factor..

the Philippines..
the officials are corrupt..
the people just always comment..
no unity..
no progression..

but i do know that somewhere and somehow,
there are a lot of people here who makes a difference
and will be a big part for this contry's progression..

raindrops...

the busy drops of the rain,
it made me feel uncomfortable..
i wonder if someone could hear me
scream, moan, and cry..
my very intense weeping goes with the rain..
so busy,
so cold,
so harsh..
please, let everyone hear me!!
i'm dying!
dying in darkness!
dying in silence..